Having spent some time in airline retail during my career, I decided to have a flick through to see how things worked on the other side of the pond. Not for American passengers the high notes of the latest fragrances, the glittering array of designer watches and jewellery and the select range of premium travel accessories that I am used to considering in flight. No, you can buy a whole lot of other stuff on SkyMall.
Where do I start?
There's furniture, lots of furniture - lamps, shelves, couches, tables, collapsible beds, bedroom suites and even a bidet sprayer for your bathroom (although I am not sure that this qualifies so much as furniture).
There are various brands of shape wear to help you hold your 'bits' in a more preferred position. There are items designed to remedy everything from bad breath and skin tags to plantar fasciitis and sleep apnea. And there's even a whole swag of stuff for your pets - 291 items in fact.
I had a bit of time on my hands while they were de-icing the various planes I sat on a few weeks back so I got to know this chaotic catalogue quite well and thought I'd share a few of my favourites with you.
Mounted Squirrel Head - $24.95.
Yes I know. It's a rather random choice to begin with. But it did remind me of all of us sitting around waiting, waiting, waiting for flights to arrive and depart. There were a few faces in the boarding queues that looked a lot like this.
I love this. It combines my two of my great passions - scribbling and dreaming. Dreaming about where I might like to go next in the world and scribbling stuff down so I don't forget that I thought about it in the first place. However it does seem that the little people of this world may be consigned to exploring the Southern hemisphere only.
Talking Dog Collar - $29.95
You record a message on the dog collar and activate it remotely - and you can change the message as often as you like. A day at the park suddenly took on a whole new lustre and I had a little chortle at the prospect of unsettling passers-by with a little pooch chatter, a bit like the old Candid Camera shows. I could see myself enjoying this for hours and hours...if I had a dog.
Hawaiian JellysTM - $39.95
There were a few offerings throughout the catalogue that claimed to ease a range of foot ailments (a particular bug bear of mine) but the range of Hawaiian JellysTM got my vote for sheer inventiveness. You could start with the tropical - Papaya, Mango, Lychee, Dragon Fruit or Coconut - branch out into a little Mysore Raspberry or Chuo Ume Plum or even scale new heights with Kilauea Volcano or Aouli Sky. America, land of the free and home of the endless choice.
40" Foldable Photo Studio - $199.95
We actually have something similar in the office and it saves a whole lot of bother when it comes to getting product shots done. Might be a little more difficult to do head shots though.
Speaking of head shots I just had to show you this one.
The Zombie of Montclaire Moors - $99.95
Or this for that matter.
SPAM Costume - $70.76
(Although after a few more hours sitting on planes I may have done just about anything to relieve the boredom!)
And last but not least there was a myriad of t-shirts on offer - these were just a few that made me laugh out loud.
(Seattle-A please note the pink box top right, my new mantra for life.)
So this is how I spend my time travelling...marvelling at the weird and wonderful and generally just keeping myself amused.
After all, there's only so much 'cultural exploration' a girl can take.
Image Source: all images are taken directly from the SkyMall.com website.