Monday 16 January 2012

The Dating Game...

Source: pinterest
As a single lass whose broken heart has been carefully glued back together over the last year or so, I am starting to notice more and more avenues  available for me to meet my next conquest, the man of my dreams, a fella.


Being quite an open-minded sort, in the past I have ogled the online options, given the introduction agency scene a whirl and speed-dated (the rapid, not drug-induced, kind) with assistance of locks and keys. No, not like that - that would be another type of blog entirely. It's actually quite harmless fun, until you realise you are - at 34 - the oldest in the room by a long way. And that was 8 years ago.

Today I read about a new method for the time-poor and travel-rich. Those clever pragmatists over at KLM have developed Meet and Seat which allows you to choose your on-board neighbours based on LinkedIn and Facebook profiles. They say it is an ideal opportunity for 'networking' but some pundits suggest it will be used more for matchmaking, whether that be between long term relationship seekers or those looking for the more abridged variety. I will use it to avoid crying babies and large, smelly people.

There's been a ground swell of news and opinion about purposeful singledom too. Each week, I read Hannah Betts' 'Things You Only Know If You're Single' column in The Times Magazine (which you will have to pay to read for yourself thanks to bad Uncle Rupert). Last week's was '...that one should forget dating sites in favour of realism.' Nuff said on that score. She also writes stuff for The Telegraph which I fall over intermittently and which you can read online for free.

And just prior to Christmas, Elizabeth Tannen shared her thoughts on the whole scene over at The Huffington Post in Five Excuses For Being Single  By the way, Elizabeth has written a fab post called 'Letting Your Silly Out' on her own blog but I digress...again.

So this led me to think about dating. My approach in the past has been underpinned by the philosophy that if you open your eyes/mind, 'the universe provides'. But I've also read things which suggest we should treat finding a partner in the same way as finding a job. Know your 'audience', targeted selection, tailor your 'CV'. It just doesn't seem to have that joyous and romantic ring to it, does it? Nor does it sound fun.

My theory is that life happens the way it happens and if we remain open along the way, we stand a chance in spite of the pitfalls.

But I'm not quite sure what you would put on this CV.

My last relationship began as a friendship with my next door neighbour and, if I exclude the last couple of months, went on for five and a half very happy years. I've met others through common interests (there were a few of these during my ballroom dancing days), chance encounters at bus stops and all sorts of liaisons in between. There have been the short and sweets, the long and lingerings, the quick fizzers - and then the gaps in between where I get to immerse myself in all the things I love to do without any of the negotiation or compromise.

And there, in that unequivocal indulgence of all the things I love, lies the rub...


Source: pinterest

The defence rests.

6 comments:

Alien said...

J and I are single - we'd both had sort-of-Ok-but-not-very-satisfactory relationships,not much younger than you are now. Then we met up one day over a pint of Guinness - her's not mine - and here we are, decades later, still resolutely single and loving it. Upwards and onwards!

Anonymous said...

I agree with your approach to love. Stay open to possibilities without forcing it or appearing desperate and, the chances are, it'll happen.

Unknown said...

Thanks gents - sage words indeed. But there are moments when I do wonder whether I can be a**ed..and then again... !#@!!?

New Aussie said...

Presumably Hannah Betts' 'Things You Only Know If Your Single' column hasn't yet included the missing apostrophe and letter "e"?

Unknown said...

Aah New Aussie. That may have been my omission...typing and doing other things at the same time. Gulp! Apologies to Hannah...

Unknown said...

Further to my last comment, I have now rectified said typo. It took a few days but it's not something I have yet learnt to manage in transit (ie. on my phone). Hope I have not sullied Hannah's literary reputation too much in the meantime.